And walk long-distance, listening to my favorite songs
The daily uniqueness is a road trip of prime
Understanding the differences when people are tired
From the eternal routines that are silent killers
Of heart’s catastrophes that should be left behind
Today is present and I should joyfully smile
Tomorrow’s trip is not promised because I may die.
Gratitude and forgiveness are part of tonight
When dreams are way-blurring around the red line.
I am a faithful trips lover and that will not change. My dream was to have a family home with three children and pets. But, currently, my focus is on traveling in my car. I want to have a place to come back to after my trips and that is an honorable goal.
However, I still do not know where that home may be.
It’s an undeniable fact that I bind the home with a person. My relationships were always connected to the feelings of security and safety in the arms of my beloved. My hope to feel the same way again won’t change.
The most important to me now is to stay and feel alive because a life without fire in the heart is meaningless. I am still single, so the flaming thoughts, for now, are a mirage.
But, the soul’s sparks should not be limited only to relationships, but also to the universal life around people. Prayers are neverending gratitude for the moments’ everyone can smile, feel, walk, listen, and enjoy with close-to-heart people. The little things I like to do are: feeding the cat and smiling under the sun ray. They will not be replayed. Watching the sunrise daily is my way to send gratitude to the Universe. When the new day comes, a fresh trip is on the cards.
Times change and people should be flexible when it comes to various travels inside or outside. I believe every trip is unique. And do you?
This post will be a bit different than my last posts. It is because I am not the same person already. Turkey’s trip changed my personality for good.
Oriental culture always amazed me. I love the smell of Turkey’s food and the traders that made me deviate from the price.
The curious thing in Turkey is that the salespersons respect the customers more if they look for a discount on the original item’s price.
Back in September 2021, I took a short trip to Turkey. I needed to clear my head and decide on a major question in my life. I should find my courage and bravery again.
Whenever I am at a life’s crossroads, I travel alone to different places. That makes me focused and determined to solve the problem.
When I am far from the daily routine, I think better.
I had nothing from what I saw in Turkey. It started with the MutualRetard I felt between people – men, women, workers, bosses, and especially sales persons to customers. It is true that in Turkey “The customer is the King.” The working ethic there is found almost nowhere else I have been before.
Mutual Retard between people is the basis for any relationship. If it is amiss, the relations fade away.
I hopped on the bus in Burgas at 03.00 am because the waiting on Turkey’s border is long. I had downloaded Elif Shafak’s book “The bastard of Istanbul,” and I started to read. Indeed, it is a great book but nothing like the author’s “Love.” It explains very well women’s lives today. Their choices to give birth or not.
By the way, it is interesting to know that many people do not think abortion is murder. I think it is that, but sometimes choices are challenging. After people make them, it is good to go to sacred places and search for forgiveness. I do it all the time when I feel like a sinner.
However, I listened to music, wrote to my lover then online, and fell asleep. It was a quiet experience for me, and I realized my worries started to fade away.
When we arrived in Istanbul, it was 9 am. Sun was shining bright, touching my skin, and I felt alive. Everything in that city makes me feel happy I live.
People forget that it is a gift to be alive and look only for the big picture, underestimating the small things in life. The little things in life make their flavor and bring happiness. Every greeting, virtual emoji by a loved one, or taking a new picture with the phone, alongside reading a good book make life easier and precious.
My former boyfriend back then replied to every message I sent him. It was like we were together on the trip. I felt happy to feel everything that life offered me back then. I remember it today. It was my happy time in 2021.
I never imagined the things that happened to me when I came back to Bulgaria. But, I enjoyed everything in Istanbul, from the beginning till the end, as I did in my past relationships.
I consumed the atmosphere, feelings, and food in Istanbul with sincere joy. After we drove through the traffic and went to the hotel, I prepared for an online meeting with my boyfriend, and we saw us. We were happy. That made me feel more inspired for the evening that came after. It was the most unforgettable evening I had until then.
I and my travel group went on a yacht that night. It was my first time being on a yacht that moved. There was a live performance on it. On the board were people from different nations – black, white, and Asian. It looked like a human’s union.
The DJ played various songs. It was the music that connected the people back then.
They forgot the everlasting racist conflicts. That made the evening special and unique.
People danced, had fun, and watched the live performance. On the second floor of the yacht was a creative business idea. Making a picture with old-style clothes, I felt like a queen. Photographs did a great job. They are professionals, and they take family or couple pictures to make the memory last forever
One of the best parts of my yacht trip was when there was a live performance with knives. I volunteered to take part in it.
Many people were afraid to not get killed by knives accidentally. But the performers are professionals, and some accidents can’t happen.
Observing people even during the live performance made me realize they are cowards. How they act in real life, they do it the same way on the fun side of it.
I did not die by the last knife that the performers threw next to my heart to show their skills. I gained respect from all the audience on the yacht. Courage is always respected, believing or not. Many women started to approach me to greet me for my bravery. I felt good after I came out alive on this dangerous journey. But I am like this in my real life too. There is no fear, no gain, after all. There are times when people should risk everything they know and not act cowardly.
Another best time of the yacht’s evening was when the DJ played an African song on which everyone stood to dance – black or white. I do not like racism. Humans are unique in their way. Everyone danced to that song, holding each other hands. That made me cry with joy.
Is it not that Humanity’s dream?
Everyone is united and not divided by ego’s struggles. People’s energy radiates from every soul.
After the collective dance finished, all visitors exited the yacht. Foreigners talked with me outside, and I almost lost my group’s traces.
That night I transformed my fear of the known, stable, and secure into Brave walking toward the unknown. Later, in 2021, I would need that.
On the same night, I uploaded my pictures on Instagram. I met a great disappointment in Turkish men. Many of them asked me to sleep with them because I am a foreigner. That is disgusting – married men to ask you to sleep with them. Turkish women are beautiful and caring, and they love their husbands deeply. I respect them a lot. In general, Balkan and Eastern Europe women are the best wives. I do not want to offend other women, but when in love, these wives are selflessly giving themselves to their men and children. Many husbands do not respect that, looking for some fun in the unknown. Of course, in my style, I told the ugly truth to the horny men and made them feel bad because they were acting that way toward their women. Justice before all is one of my life’s mottos.
On the next day, we visited the Asian part of Turkey.
On the last day of my Turkey journey, I visited a mosque before Turkish markets and MALL. I am not a religious person, but when I enter sacred places, I cry a lot and pray for forgiveness for my sins. Everyone has a past and should be accepted.
When I was in the mosque, I felt closer to Universe, and I felt like a part of something bigger than me. The people there were praying, and I felt safe. The curious thing is that the humans enter barefoot into the Muslim sanctuary. I finally understood why. There was energy entering the body, connecting it to the earth, where everyone goes after they die.
I was happy when I was in Turkey, and I will go there again. I believe the next time I go there, I will be with someone dear that will not leave me on my own. We will experience everything together because sometimes I got tired of being my solo trip buddy. Until then, I will go on my own.