Walking Away From The Loved Person Is A Choice

Walking Away From The Loved person is a choice

Walking Away From The Loved Person Is A Choice

that not many people make

Then and now, it always has been about choosing the personal reality. Everyone had someone they loved so deeply, and heartfully, who they thought couldn’t live without. But, when the relationship started to wreck because of communication’s lack, way too many quarrels, and secrets, even for good, one of the partners or both wanted to break free. Then the time to walk away from the loved person comes.

Through pain, tears, uncertainty, and a lack of courage, the period may take many years. For me to break away from my past relationships similar patterns of imbalance between giving and taking, took between 6 months and 8 years. Sometimes, I blame my honest loyalty on moving away slower than appropriate by a partner that shows he doesn’t care much about me because I am not his priority. Sticking by a man’s side in silence has its flaws. That will not change in my case because when I choose someone, it’s forever, even if he breaks up my heart. It’s the way I will not change because it’s a part of my personality.

However, that gave me a lot of love for other people from distance. It’s not bad though. May the Universe give my positive energy to everyone I have met.

Someday, the love boomerang may come back to me.

Why walking away from a loved person is challenging?

Usually, Lovers like to spend a lot of time together – on the phone or in person, not so much on messages. From the first month of the relationship starts to get clear where the dating will go. Intuition never lies, but people don’t listen to it because of their rose-colored glasses while having butterflies in their stomachs. Depending on the emotions, people start to understand better what they have to give and receive in the new-formed bond first six months.

In my past relationships, there was an imbalance. I gave everything too soon and the men left me emotionally early – around the third month. Although my mind was clear, I stood along with those I loved, poisoning the feeling between us. I started to wonder how they even put up with me for so long time. Yes, they are good men and for me, looking at my past actions, I don’t have any right to complain. Walking away in silence from those I loved the most was my choice. They respected it and were happy about it. That means there was never true love in the way I felt and imagine it between us.

Avoiding the red flags because my heart wanted to be with my partners brought me no good. After my numerous deep introspection today, I found some of my past mistakes, but time can’t turn back. So, I keep moving on trying not to be a fool again because of my life’s perceptions.

The reason for walking away is someone is so hurt and uncertain about another person’s feelings for many reasons, that it’s unbearable.

The last breakup I had, was a weird dialogue. “How should I start the topic about us like a couple since  I don’t know if the other side of the couple thinks it? I was afraid you break the bond between us,” and the reply was: “I expected that.  You’re creating complications. Stop thinking and calm down. You don’t deserve to speak with me because you don’t understand anything. Bye.”

Who’s wrong or right doesn’t matter because facts and actions speak louder than words. Whenever there aren’t any, things are clear for everyone. I walked away from that relationship, even though I love deeply that man and forever will do. It’s about my pride and honor as a human. I’m complicated but want to know the truth and not be deceived by mixed signals. If someone’s time and efforts are unworthy of me, so be it, I will not disrupt anyone. If a man is interested, he will call, meet, and text me. I give the same in return.  That’s the end of my current romantic stories vision. Everything else is procrastinating the breakup between two partners.

Walking away may look differently on the male’s side. They may push intentionally women because they love them or want to become more stable to enter a relationship. Even if that’s the case, they, at least, should tell why they do whatever or give a hint by showing interest and attention to their women. Otherwise, females will leave with hurt pride, low self-esteem, the feeling of undesirability, and a broken heart.

The choice to leave or not is important and gives different consequences. Will they be bearable?

Usually, the pain of leaving someone loved is because the relationship becomes stagnant, overdue outlived since partners don’t evolve as persons and couples, or both feel unappreciated. After all, they feared sharing their thoughts freely with each other. If people can’t express themselves in front of their lovers, there is no trust foundation and respect the differences. Problems are in the long-time silence, overthinking, or unwillingness to speak the truth directly.

There are many other reasons to leave someone loved, but the heart knows best when and if it’s time to do it. That happens only if people listen to it without logical analysis.

 

How To Handle Unrequited Love In Style?

How To Handle Unrequited Love With Style?

How To Handle Unrequited Love In Style?

It’s written for myself and many other singles out there.

The last days before my anniversary are the most challenging because I thoroughly analyze everything in my life. Questions like how far I went, who was by my side, and what I achieved in the last 365 days are the norm for me.

The topic I feel professional is how to handle unrequited love in style by experience.

Many parts of my psyche died last year to be replaced with new patterns. Without a doubt, unrequited love journeys gave me the best lessons. That reminds me of an interesting quote: “Life’s three best teachers: heartbreaks, empty pockets, failures.”

After many life situations I faced, I agree with that statement and have experience with them all. Heartbreaks taught me to trust no one, empty pockets to treasure food, and the roof I have, and failures motivated me to look for another way to achieve what I want.

Today’s topic will be about heartbreaks because they take a lot of time to overcome and keep going onward. In my case, failures created the Poetry book I want to publish since a young age. The empty pockets transformed me into a good household accountant.

But since I am nostalgic, and The Solar eclipse affecting me, I will write for heartbreaks teacher. Only by handling it in style people can keep going forward.

Unrequited love is popular and for me, recently was maybe 25 rejection I received when, as usual, I told about my feelings to a man. The last time I was called “a special girl, but not in a romantic way.” That is the same old saying for staying friends when men do not want to commit to me. 

It was expected and I felt funny to even imagine something may happen between me and a man like him. So, I moved on quite fast,t because I observed the signs the last few months, and my denial wasn’t big.

However, the good in my recent situation is finally I found out why men reject me. The reasons are my oversharing information that is not needed, claiming my will for a serious relationship, being dramatic, and unconsciously acting like a victim. I will not explain those reasons, because I am sure most people know them. But intelligent men can feel these reasons from afar and of course, they will run away from responsibility to a somehow clingy person. I never imagined myself being that way, but my recent self-observation told me otherwise.

But how to handle unrequited love in style?

My experience gave me these solutions: keeping myself busy, wine tasting, and reminding myself sober-headed of my real-life situation as a single mom. It’s a fact most men will not take a woman with a child because,  I am a beaten family card, objectively speaking.  That is the norm, and I do not expect any more to find romantic love, but choosing to believe in miracles gives me motivation.

Keeping myself busy

It has been a long road I walked since last year for my today’s transformation as a personality.  For the first time in my life, I started to love myself and forgave my mistakes. But, there are still old patterns that should be cut off to become a better person.

After every rejection I received, I became motivated to improve myself professionally and personally. I started to learn new skills to keep my mind busy and productive. The last time I got rejected by a man, I drove around 600 km to improve my driving skill.

Last year’s rejection I survived by keeping myself busy walking and getting fit. I went 15 kilograms down and took the challenge to join as many writing contests as possible. It’s about the productive way to overcome the pain and negative feelings of low self-esteem and unworthiness. They will not fade away, but distracting the mind saves people to go into depression. Healing hearts takes time and a lot of physical business.

Wine Tasting

That is my favorite way to handle unrequited love in style. I do not get drunk, but while tasting my wine, I cry a lot,  and my writing inspiration goes highly intense until I take care of my emotions. I do not need anybody to take care of my feelings, I should do it alone. Poetry and writing are therapy for me. My best works are the ones I wrote in my worst state. That shall be forever in my case.

Another good point in wine tasting is that I try various wines – from red to rose and white. In our world, there are so many tastes I like to experience, but I think about them mostly when I am hurt. However, it’s a good way to move on through life.

One of the reasons I love wines is that they are made with specific feelings from their creators, and the tastes are various depending on what is put into the making process.

There is a thing I like to say to myself after each rejection: “Cry as much as needed! When you’re done, put on your red lipstick and stilettos. Move on with your best look!” 

I put on a smile on my face, and it doesn’t matter how much pain I feel. Sarcasm and laughing are great defenses that not everyone notices, but once a person understands the hiding behind a good mood about me, it’s a friend of mine forever.

Reminding myself sober-headed of my real-life situation as a single mom.

Many men came into my life, but my daughter stood by my side forever. If things in my relationships are bad, I remind myself I  should be a sober-headed single mom who gives a good example to her child. My girl will not like seeing a weak mom that cries for a man, who doesn’t treasure her, or a broken adult that can’t manage herself. As I explained before, being a single mom is an organization.

I dare to say dating a single mom is far more rewarding because she does not like wasting time with mind games of empty flirts. It’s like people get what they bargained for. Objectively speaking, a mom with a child is a family, not luggage. Of course, most males do not understand a situation like that, but the problem is not mine.

My real-life situation as a single mom is not the best one but I became a strong woman that will be a supporting rock for her man. Single moms have been in places where the feared-to-let-go something that doesn’t work women do not even imagine.

Unfortunately, most females stay in uncomfortable situations because they lack the courage to step on their two feet.  Accepting domestic emotional, verbal, and physical abuse as the norm is not the answer. But everyone has their choices.

Handling unrequited love in style is important in human lives.

People should not allow someone to step over them and the disappointment to kill their living will. Heartbreaks are life’s slices that make the soul complete. Tears are healing, bad experience is building up the own self-esteem, and rejection is another brick on the heart’s wall. There is no other way to keep going through daily challenges than breaking the emotional chains that people put on themselves by choice.

Right said, not even one of my past rejectors cared for my personality. It was funny for six of them to call me on my birthday, sending wishes. It’s hypocritical somehow, but at the same time polite.

However, as a good person, I forgave everything to everyone. Letting go of the negativity in my soul, heart, and mind for those, who didn’t treasure me until I was by their side, it’s a step closer to my individuality and choices freedom.

In the end, what happened, can not be changed, and what will happen, occurs in one way or another. But for me, it’s better to be stylish in everything I go through – it’s my life’s signature.

 

 

 

 

 

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