Moving On

Walking Away From The Loved Person Is A Choice

Walking Away From The Loved person is a choice

Walking Away From The Loved Person Is A Choice

that not many people make

Then and now, it always has been about choosing the personal reality. Everyone had someone they loved so deeply, and heartfully, who they thought couldn’t live without. But, when the relationship started to wreck because of communication’s lack, way too many quarrels, and secrets, even for good, one of the partners or both wanted to break free. Then the time to walk away from the loved person comes.

Through pain, tears, uncertainty, and a lack of courage, the period may take many years. For me to break away from my past relationships similar patterns of imbalance between giving and taking, took between 6 months and 8 years. Sometimes, I blame my honest loyalty on moving away slower than appropriate by a partner that shows he doesn’t care much about me because I am not his priority. Sticking by a man’s side in silence has its flaws. That will not change in my case because when I choose someone, it’s forever, even if he breaks up my heart. It’s the way I will not change because it’s a part of my personality.

However, that gave me a lot of love for other people from distance. It’s not bad though. May the Universe give my positive energy to everyone I have met.

Someday, the love boomerang may come back to me.

Why walking away from a loved person is challenging?

Usually, Lovers like to spend a lot of time together – on the phone or in person, not so much on messages. From the first month of the relationship starts to get clear where the dating will go. Intuition never lies, but people don’t listen to it because of their rose-colored glasses while having butterflies in their stomachs. Depending on the emotions, people start to understand better what they have to give and receive in the new-formed bond first six months.

In my past relationships, there was an imbalance. I gave everything too soon and the men left me emotionally early – around the third month. Although my mind was clear, I stood along with those I loved, poisoning the feeling between us. I started to wonder how they even put up with me for so long time. Yes, they are good men and for me, looking at my past actions, I don’t have any right to complain. Walking away in silence from those I loved the most was my choice. They respected it and were happy about it. That means there was never true love in the way I felt and imagine it between us.

Avoiding the red flags because my heart wanted to be with my partners brought me no good. After my numerous deep introspection today, I found some of my past mistakes, but time can’t turn back. So, I keep moving on trying not to be a fool again because of my life’s perceptions.

The reason for walking away is someone is so hurt and uncertain about another person’s feelings for many reasons, that it’s unbearable.

The last breakup I had, was a weird dialogue. “How should I start the topic about us like a couple since  I don’t know if the other side of the couple thinks it? I was afraid you break the bond between us,” and the reply was: “I expected that.  You’re creating complications. Stop thinking and calm down. You don’t deserve to speak with me because you don’t understand anything. Bye.”

Who’s wrong or right doesn’t matter because facts and actions speak louder than words. Whenever there aren’t any, things are clear for everyone. I walked away from that relationship, even though I love deeply that man and forever will do. It’s about my pride and honor as a human. I’m complicated but want to know the truth and not be deceived by mixed signals. If someone’s time and efforts are unworthy of me, so be it, I will not disrupt anyone. If a man is interested, he will call, meet, and text me. I give the same in return.  That’s the end of my current romantic stories vision. Everything else is procrastinating the breakup between two partners.

Walking away may look differently on the male’s side. They may push intentionally women because they love them or want to become more stable to enter a relationship. Even if that’s the case, they, at least, should tell why they do whatever or give a hint by showing interest and attention to their women. Otherwise, females will leave with hurt pride, low self-esteem, the feeling of undesirability, and a broken heart.

The choice to leave or not is important and gives different consequences. Will they be bearable?

Usually, the pain of leaving someone loved is because the relationship becomes stagnant, overdue outlived since partners don’t evolve as persons and couples, or both feel unappreciated. After all, they feared sharing their thoughts freely with each other. If people can’t express themselves in front of their lovers, there is no trust foundation and respect the differences. Problems are in the long-time silence, overthinking, or unwillingness to speak the truth directly.

There are many other reasons to leave someone loved, but the heart knows best when and if it’s time to do it. That happens only if people listen to it without logical analysis.

 

Dear Darlin’ Please Excuse My Writing

Dear Darlin', please excuse my writing

Dear Darlin’ Please Excuse My Writing.

is for

These sweet, short romances that people remember.

“Dear Darlin’, Please Excuse my writing” is the verse I love the most with today’s musical thinking confession.

It’s funny how people stop waiting for someone out of the blue. For example, when they take the bus home. The situation moves incredibly fast and the loved ones go somewhere down in the passenger’s mind.

That happened to me today. I am still waiting for a proper explanation from my heart and logic. It’s weird how my deep affection faded away. While listening to Olly Murs’s “Dear Darlin,” I found myself letting every past relationship go with the words: “We tried” like it never happened.

Is it painful to remember, a self-respecting idea, a nasty move, or a ruthless attitude? Please excuse my writing.

Maybe the thought “It was sweet. It was short. We tried.” in Olly Murs’ song “Dear Darlin'” applies to every past and unsuccessful relationship that makes people forget about their self-respect or blur boundaries in the name of love. But today, I lost it because I chose to let everything go.

Time makes people see the truth, and when there is nothing more to peel from their soul or heart, the mind shuts down and puts the negative emotions on the back burner. Nobody wants to feel like a doormat or a sorrowful penguin that walks on the ice. It’s the primal survival instinct. Right said, begging for someone’s attention is exhausting.

I always say that people are in or out of someone else’s life.  That statement reminds me to stop chasing windmills. I may become pitiful, doing the same things, and expecting different results. That is not working well for anyone, but practicing writing does.

Dear Darlin’, Dignity is a respected quality.

When people lose it, is sad and even those who made them pitiful, start to feel guilty. It’s better to stop on time with an objective look at the situation than go after feelings that can make someone laughable. Unrequited love is comfortable in terms of personal development. When people are in a pit they find out a lot of qualities they didn’t know they possessed. Of course, pain, disappointment, sorrow, and low self-esteem are present. In these situations for women is good to think about it like it’s childbirth which is a painful experience, followed by happiness.

Protecting my honor, I disciplined myself to look at my unfortunate lovers like girlfriends. It was short and sweet romances we tried to make into something long-term.

It’s somehow easier to let them go and cut ties with time because even the strongest bond, when not nurtured, fades away for years without communication. Rarely, life ashes, especially romantic ones, can bring a phoenix to life. The process of acceptance of the men I loved so much is slow and steady, but it gives me mental peace when I put them in another category of my heart.

Yes, I love every man that unreciprocated my feelings and hope they’re happy with their freedom, but my life is one to dig more than enough into something that was never meant to be. For that reason, in my heart’s hall is a crowd of past unrequited lovers’ memories which I treasure but let go.

Please Excuse my Writing, because I keep moving on with pride and independence.  Indeed, these qualities saved my life from becoming a negative emotions trash bin.

There were times when I loved too passionately and deeply. My feelings were always over everything acceptable. Most people hated that. I understood it by experience. 

Right said, for most of my life, I felt unloved by my parents, boyfriends, and schoolmates. The trauma was deep-harsh. It took me many years to heal from it but I am still feeling broken. Those who are not whole, often find themselves undesired. Brokenness is unattractive in most cases.

Dear Darlin’, the potential serious companions can feel people who have low self-worth and almost no one starts to build them up.

Giving a supporting hand is not for everyone. It takes compassion, empathy, and out-of-the-box thinking. It can be improved when there is a will for that.

These, who give a helping hand anyway attain the role of savior. I have been one many times and ended up hurt and torn inside out. Even so, my belief is when there is true love that may be unrequited, humans should help others to grow wings. I feel grateful the men I met became better people even on my back. Surviving the storm is one of my specialties, but it takes bravery that many men lack.

Recently my new boss told me: “Males should have your qualities, even if you’re a female.”  Sadly, the world became so mismatched in genders. Masculine qualities went to women and feminine to men.

Dear Darlin’, I continue to believe like a mad woman in miracles. I should have the motivation to keep looking for true love.

 

 

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