Steps Backward – Poem

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Dedicated to the past wounds that today’s healing

I made two steps forward

Then four steps backward

The moment I opened

My tightly closed heart,

I met indifference

Or maybe it was polite talk?

Today it doesn’t matter

I understood that I seem far

Into another universe

Of oceans apart

These big parallels

Have made me step backward

I think it is obvious

From platonic discourse

That I should continue

Doing my steps backward

Because there is a saying

Between two persons

There are ten steps in the diapasons

When the one doing the five

But the other fearfully hides,

The actor should move on,

But with steps backward

******

I have written that poem back in April 2022. My heart’s healing was still between the past and present of my life then.

Why April?

It was spring, the fourth month of the year, and the beginning of a change for me in many personal departments. They were exactly four: worsened health, a fated lover, a new career idea, and refined driving skills. Today I was reminded about April because I found out about my driving violations in the same month and number. Based on numerology, the number 4 means a realistic view of life.

Taking a look at me now, I see my lack of practical life vision.

The interesting fact is my life changed a lot. The people who I attracted to myself in the last year are practical, stable, conservative, and realistic. It seems my feminine energy changed for good. I still don’t understand how that happened, but my intuition is rarely wrong.

What’s the point of Steps Backward?

These steps help to rethink many situations and see the signs of something that is working or not. For me, today made me remember how far I came, and how to walk further. It’s a long road that my eyes do not see yet. The reminder I got with the penalty slips is a clear sign I should look back and burn old foundations to open myself up for something new after paying my debts in finance and karma, of course.