Distant Commitment Is The New Trend

That Brings The Relationship To The Unknown

Today is interesting to have a love relationship. I name it distant commitment.

Usually, the relationships start online or like long-distance ones. When it starts, both parties have their own lives and enjoy this type of relationship.
I called it distant commitment because it sounds right to me. Between the time for real-life family members, work, and own things to do, the virtual partners stay far behind in priorities of each other.
This situation is like: I am with you, but only when I have time. That is not bad, though, because partners stay independent. They develop themselves as persons, and when they need someone to talk they speak to each other.
But this is not a real commitment. It is like an illusion that will stay the same if both partners don’t make things more realistic. They should give a deadline for when their relationship goes real. It doesn’t matter will the communication goes over the phone or on video chat.

If both partners care for each other seriously, they will make a slight commitment. They hear out each other and have regular video meetings or phone calls. There should be a connection for the distant commitment to become a real one.
That happens only if the partners are ready for a relationship.

Many people were hurt.

While women always keep looking for love outside sexual boundaries and want to go deeper into soul connections, men do not want to deal with too many emotions.

That way, in the distant commitment male’s part of the relationship, goes sexually dependent and satisfied. Meanwhile, the women’s side of this type of relation creates illusions that fill the mind with pink and idealistic visions.

But until when?

Probably until it makes both partners happy with this.
The truth for distant commitment looks bright for people who do not want to commit to the relationship and prefer to live in their own mind’s world. And why not since there is someone else that allows that to happen.
Distant commitment is not a real commitment to a couple’s relationship. It becomes real when there are more than only words in your free time. Under more, I mean sincere interest, respect, and communication. If they miss, the distant commitment will stay longer.

At some point in the relationship, one of the persons wakes up from the pink bubble dream and moves out of this imaginary relationship.

When the person moves out, it may be completely broken. My thought is the distant commitment is not worth it if both sides do not want to engage in a real relationship. That can happen if both sides have mutual feelings, shown with actions.

Everyone can speak great words, after all. But many people fear committing and prefer this kind of relationship.

Reasons for choosing this type of relationship for people are:

  1. Fear from a broken heart

  2. Past toxic relationship

  3. Unreadiness to commit

  4. No will to have a relationship

  5. Comfort in their single life as it is

Fear from a broken heart.

That is the most common reason for distant commitment. When people experience many one-sided loves and dumping, they have felt too many times hurt and built walls. They expect the next man or woman they meet will reject them too.

Usually, it happens like that. Because what people create in their minds is what they attract. Rejection is not a good thing, but it gives options. Depending on the point of view after the rejection, people see an opportunity to grow or an isolated exit from their future love life.

Choices are made by the individuals, of their own accord.

If persons see the opportunity to grow, they will know what they can do if another rejection happens and get by it easier. Choosing an isolated exit to love life, people make the same mistakes with different partners. Heart always will be broken from smaller or bigger life situations, especially when it comes to love and relationships.

Living together with another person, or dating them, is always a challenge. It needs a lot of work and heart’s walls falling. If opening the heart doesn’t happen, there is no relationship and no commitment.
Every breakup and rejection is hard for people. But without them, a person can not grow and be who is it in the present. I do not mean people should go fast after another partner when their heart is broken or seek someone who breaks their heart.

However, isolating is not the answer.

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Past toxic relationships.

They are a serious reason for the distant commitment. When people are in love, they are blinded.

At first, the meeting with a potential partner is about body chemistry. When the sex desire is consuming, and the two people move in together, problems arise. If they rely only on sexual attraction, it is a matter of time for this aspect to turn their relationship toxic. It may even lead to aggressive sexual abuse or too many quarrels if the body’s needs are not satisfied.

When there is a lack of emotional and communicational bonds, it is easy once strong sexual attraction to turns into toxic and violent abuse.

Partners are so interested only in their bodies that they become obsessive.

When sexual activity is not the same as in the first encounters between the couple, there is a high possibility that leads to abusive extremes in the relationship between both partners.

Sexual tension between two people is a good thing, but not in the long term or when it comes to commitment.

Many people believe that when they have great intimate life every other problem in the relationship between them will be solved.

My last relationship also started as “love at first sight” with too much passion and chemistry. In the end, I lost myself in all the toxic situations I got – from quarrels to unacceptance of myself by the other person.

The lack of emotional communication turns the stones of the relationship that started only from sexual attraction. It makes the once beautiful relationship that filled the partner’s heads with joy and excitement toxic.

Good songs that explain good toxic relationships are Rhianna’s and Eminem’s “Love the way you lie” songs.

Some people are so blindly in love with the illusion or the body of their partner.

They go to an extreme to obsess with their partner because their love is like a sickness.

Some individuals like it, others do not, but the truth is that when there is a past toxic relations experience, there is no such a thing as commitment. The fear is too big.

People hope the same to not happen as in former relationships. That is a huge mistake, and it should be fixed by self-healing or even going to a psychologist.

The former toxic relationships create a stop for the persons to open their hearts and accept eventual new lovers. The trauma is too deep and needs a lot of time to heal. People with past toxic relationships fear being loved in the wrong way and lack self-love. We all know that when there is no self-love is hard to love someone else. It is needed strong encouragement and love to move out from the mindset of past toxic relationships.

Distant commitment in these situations is preferred by the people who do not want a serious relationship because they feel it is safer to commit not in reality.

But, I tell again, the distant commitment outside sincere communication and clear signals is nothing more than just a dream about some spectacular romance found in the books.

Unreadiness to commit.

That is the main reason people choose distant commitment.

Many people grew up in bad family situations. They decide they will not marry and have only fun with other partners. When they feel something more toward a potential date, they run away from responsibility toward the other person.

The reason is they saw how the things between their parents did not work and were fake.

On a subconscious level, the individual fears he makes the same mistake in choosing the wrong partner as the parents and has an unpleasant situation. That makes the person not ready to commit.

Being in distant commitment is intoxicating for unready for commitment people. They can say they have a relationship, are false in their own eyes and the eyes of others, and believe they have someone. In their mind everything is possible.

When they have the time they chat with their crush.

The feeling about it is good because the writing is without sincere care for the needs of another partner. Unreadiness to commit can be gone through if the person wants to try going out of the self-built feeling’s walls. That happens sooner or later, but when the time is too far in the future, the eventual partner from the distant commitment is long gone.

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No will to have a relationship

That is also often met in the present relationship’s situations.

Many people are self-sufficient and do not want a relationship because they do not want to deal with other people’s emotions.

Some of those who do not want a relationship are narcissists, and they look for one only to show themselves they are still wanted and unique.

People who work too much, and have high ambitions, sometimes do not want relationships. They fear they make them distracted.

But, the right partner never will distract the loved one if there is mutual acceptance and understanding.

Some individuals were disappointed in all kinds of relationships so much that they isolate themselves from any human contact. They prefer not to communicate with other people and usually transfer their love to the animals.  

Everyone has been betrayed many times in their lives. It is about the choice to close your mind, heart, and body to others or not.

Relationships – business or emotional, are inevitable, as much as persons run from them. It is better to be accepted.

In the end, all people do in their lives starts and finishes with other’s people participation. For that reason, the distant commitment I speak about is also a safer place for narcissists and people who do not want relationships.

But, at some point, they get tired of this writing and not feeling close to other human bodies. If they do not, well, that is stubbornness and will that made me envious. I tell that again, it is about choices people make daily.

But the real commitment needs two bodies and souls that inspire each other. Just because it is clear that people look for a place they can go into by the psychology.

Comfort in their single life as it is.

People’s single life is a temporary situation in which they need to recollect themselves. Distant commitment is well for a short-term relationship if the two people do not want to go deeper at the moment. But they usually know it is not a real thing, but prefer to stay in distant commitments because they do not want to leave their single life. And that is okay, but only if it is temporary.

Usually, people that broke up go fast into distant commitments to fill the void of last love. They feel treasured and filled with the emotional holes of not being appreciated. They perfectly know that and do not want something more than writing with unknown people. It is like writing psychological talk that makes them feel better.

But they begin to feel emotionally attached, and this can turn the newly found relationship.

The Distant commitment is a good beginning of something serious, but sometimes it can lead to another toxic relationship.

Usually, when two people in distant commitment relations meet, they go for sex most of the time. After that, the relationship goes down to the starting point of the meeting between two strangers. The distant commitment fling finishes as fast as it began. That is not in all cases.

Until the distant commitment lasts, both participants in it may mature and build a strong connection.

In different cases, the distant commitment may turn into a beautiful relationship. That depends on the feelings that are put in it by both partners and the bond they created. The time they spent together is of importance. If it is quality time and they stood by each other’s side in the distant commitment issues.

That transforms the relationship into a strong union between two minds. When the minds are connected, bodies naturally follow that connection. As a romanticist, I can say some distant commitments end like a fairytale. I wish everyone that.

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But what is the difference between distant commitment, casual relationship, and friends with benefits relationship?

You can read a lot about these topics on the Internet. I have read too much about them too, but I do not add sources. I state my opinion.
Distant commitment: I write you when I have time, and I do not care what will happen or when you write me back.

A casual relationship: We always have someone to cuddle, do sex with, and spend time together, but that doesn’t mean I am interested in a commitment to you.

Friends with benefits: We are great friends and meet our needs in sex, but that will not make us lovers or go in the long-term romance run.

The conclusion is that all of these types of relationships have the potential to be true love, soulmates meetings, or even long-time marriages. The components in these relations are how much people want to invest in them as time, feelings, and communication. When starting any kind of relationship, both partners should make clear to each other what they do. They should be clear about how happy are they in their relationships.

Did they overcome the fears that can make them distant?

In my opinion, all these relationships stay fake until both partners do not decide to break up or commit.

Of course, they should spend a lot of time talking to make clear what they want.

Every distant relationship – commitment, casual or beneficial needs to have a deadline. I mean when the relationship will end or be closer in terms of moving to another partner’s life. I know my statement sounds not good, but we all have one life to live to waste it with something illusional.

If we love or like someone, we need to be closer physically. Not for sex, but for a supporting shoulder if the partner needs it.

Even if there is a risk, people should think carefully about what they want from their relationships. Otherwise, both partners will be hurt. I never start a long-distance relationship if I do not intend to make it close to one in a certain period.

But many people keep up with the flow of life.

It is about the choice once again.

True Love’s Talk

Do People Know What It Is That Phenomena?

Many people speak about true love. It is the most popular topic all over the world in any industry.

But what is indeed this so often used topic’s talk?

Humans need too much attention. They misunderstand the love interest.

There are a lot of types of interests and feelings.

Some think respecting someone as a writer or as a fighting person is love. But that is not it. It is just deep respect and a feeling of admiration.
Others believe true love is pure lust all the time. Sexual desires are also not true love because they are momentary emotions and a high level of happiness or serotonin hormones.
The third group of humans thinks true love is the everlasting talk of different topics that create so-called platonic love. That is also not the true love we see on the big screen or in books because at some point in the communication between two persons comes a hole of silence. It doesn’t matter if both persons are too knowledgeable talkers, they can’t find new topics if not trying something different.
The fourth group of humans thinks that the auras and zodiac between two personalities with compatible zodiac signs make the perfect soulmates and true love couple for life. But here is the difference between soulmates, twin flames, and karmic relationships that live in some illusional astrology world that washes up their brains. True love is something else. Because often the karmic relationships are toxic and destruct the personality a lot. It takes after this karma for the person to build anew.
The fifth group of people believes that when they are comfortable with someone, this is indeed true love. Still, they have some conditions toward their partner, built from their comfort feelings. These people try to make true love in their minds, creating self-belief that they are indeed in eternal companionship till death.

But being delusional makes people weak and dead inside because they do not stay open up to new people in their lives.

These examples show that many people lack a proper understanding of so-called true love. I am not saying I know it all, but I can speak up with my opinion about this topic. The choice to understand is always in the eye and the mind of the beholder.

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The main words I use to describe true love are:
unconditional; acceptance of the person; chemistry; open mind; common interests; partners to complement each other; endless curiosity.


That Love is something like a mirage. In the relationships are too many conditions. People try their best to make things work, but in the end, the problem stays unsolved. When some states are unmet for a long time, one of the partners begins to quarrel with the other. Sometimes that can’t change based on the skills of another partner in the couple. In this case, there is a possibility to make a compromise for one party. If that can’t happen, probably more time to learn the proper skills is needed. What do I mean? I give you an example. When the man in the couple wants his woman to shave his back, it is hard for him to understand that she can’t do it good and immediately. In this case, the husband should stay patient and give enough time to the wife to do the things. These situations often make the man angry, and he quarrels with the woman. It is a small thing, but anger turns the woman off, and she loses her confidence. Some people are skillful with some things where others are not and need more time to learn.
Conditions lead to disappointment because they are a way of expectations for perfection. But all partners are imperfect.

Acceptance of the person

It’s connected with the conditions. If partners can not accept the flaws of each other, they can never make a healthy relationship with love. Opposite, they will burn their connection with hate. Another example here: when the man sleeps long, and the woman wakes up early, they can’t drink coffee in the morning together, but they can do it in the afternoon. The person should not be irritated by the habit other partner has, but should use it as a method to enrich their own life. The woman could do some personal work until the man wakes up late and not blames him.


It is the dominant aspect that brings people together at first. But only physical chemistry is not enough to build a love relationship. It is a considerable part of the process, but it should be on a deeper emotional level. With years, physical appearance changes, and body attraction fades. If there is no emotional connection between both partners or no communication on different topics, the relationship is doomed. The flame of first-sight love will burn to ashes, and true love can not establish.

Another aspect of this topic’s post is the open mind of both partners in the relationship.

I am not speaking about school degrees or work and life experience here. My main point is that the two people in a relationship should be emotionally intelligent and listen to each other’s opinions without judgment. An open mind means a mind that is open to hearing another point of view without forcing one of the partners to accept another’s opinion. The forcing may happen with quarrel, fear, or showing no care to continue the conversation when opinions differ.

That means there is no open mind to each other’s ways of speaking. When that is amiss, it is a matter of time for both partners to become distant.
As all of us know, the truth comes clear with the equal participation of both interlocutors. That is why arguments in a friendly way are more creative and connect the partners more than any quarrels, and apologies after them. Because when there is quarrel, fear, or force, there is a shattered heart by those things.

Common interests are a must in all kinds of relations.

They keep people connected and provide them with new topics to speak on, and do not get bored in each other’s company. In love life in the long term, these interests play a huge role. When there is a real love relationship, things happen without hardships. Common interests are the first and last stepping stone that burns the connection between two person’s hearts. If these interests fade, the relationship is doomed, and this is inevitable in time. The problem is solved if both partners constantly work on themselves, and develop their minds, and that way, they find new sources of talking topics. Two people in a relationship should make some compromises and listen with their hearts to what their significant one is saying.

Most of the time that couples spend together is not like this. They do their things without listening to each other and forget what common interests brought them together. When no new common interests, talk between two people becomes dull and empty, and the connection between the two person’s hearts starts to fade away.
Everyone indeed needs some quality time alone, but most of the time the two lovers are together, it is more important they work on their connection. Finding time for ourselves is not an easy task, but when there is a couple, the good of it should be a priority. Here I should say that managing time and divide it equally between all fields of life.

Another thing to consider about True love’s talk is that the partners should complement each other.

As we all know, no one is perfect. That is why people should complement each other and the weak sides of their partners and make teamwork for the relationship to grow. If only one person fights, compromises, and sacrifices everything for the relationship, that is a doomed dream for true love. If the two people work together, things will be different.
My point is like that: One person is practical, the other is emotional. Partners should not blame each other for their different life approaches.

Opposite, they should see the other point of view and use it when needed in life problems. They should complement each other’s weak sides and calm the significant ones when their control is lost. The couple doesn’t need quarrels.

Life is too stressful anyway.

Both people should complement the missing part for the relationship to grow into something beautiful. That is the way that the couple stays strong and grows old.
A good example is when it comes to children in the family. If the one partner is aggressive or too demanding, he should not help the child with school homework because it will trigger a quarrel. He needs to do other house activities until the calm parent takes care of the kid’s homework.

That way it will be no hurt feelings but a peaceful home atmosphere.
Another experience is when one of the partners doesn’t like to cook but to clean. That way one person will cook, and the other will do the cleaning. The home will be clean, and no one will complain about missing homemade meals.

The last aspect of True love I see is pretty different than most people.

As time goes by, topics go dull, and the relationship becomes boring. When there is nothing to talk about anymore or outside the daily routines, curiosity comes to light. I often say that people should save the child in them and believe in miracles. That happens only when it is endless curiosity.

The curiosity feeds from reading, listening, and overcoming the fears of daily life. It is a fact all people will die someday, that it is inevitable.

But is it not better before they go to another world, to learn as much as they can from the place they are in the present?

The endless curiosity of both partners in a relationship makes their bond stronger because the two parties will discover new things and places together. They live in the moments together. But only if they allow themselves to do it and if the partners want to share their experiences. Both persons in a couple should improve themselves daily. Only that way do they become the best version of themselves, and they keep safe their children’s past that makes them smile and curious.

After I shared my opinion about True love’s talk, the conclusion is that this phenomenon happens probably once or twice in a lifetime, if people are lucky.
Usually, even when people meet their true love, they run away from it for different fears. Some persons misunderstand twinned flames, karmic debts, and soulmates. Most of them look for comfortable love that is far from the true one.
Reasons for missed true love are different:
  • Distant countries
  • Too expensive
  • One person is taken into another relationship and doesn’t want to go out
  • Fears from the unknown
  • Not flexible enough to move on
  • Unsure if one person is the right person for other
  • Blinded by physical appearance
  • Lust misunderstood with love
  • Not enough courage to leave the comfort zone
  • Missing the guts to fight courageously for love
  • Children – I want to add here that children need happy parents

Everyone can see different reasons for themselves. But if people live only for comfort thoughts, they miss love, life, and everything else that makes them alive inside. 

Every person is free to choose to stay the same way of living or try something new, and maybe find the true love that we all know and heard of in movies, books, and songs.
True love may be found rare, but if you ask me, it is better to give it a try and have it than sitting in the corner of your boring or way too comfortable life and thinking: “What if I could meet true love?”
Of course, there will be hardships, but they are worth it if a person lives their life whole-hearted. In the end, nothing is impossible. If only people overcome their fears, they meet true love talk they only heard about from different places.



“True Love: What Love Is and What It Is Not?”

“What Is True Love?”

“10 Things You Need To Know About True Love.”

“What is True Love?”

“What is True Love? A Deeper Insight.”



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